It's wrong to keep any of you expecting a miracle.
There will be nothing new here.
It's been almost two years since I last time drew something half-decent.
Everything since has just gone from bad to worse.
I'm not being overly critical here when I say I can't get one single line right anymore.
I just can't.
It's beyond me how I ever could. I don't even remember what it feels like to be able to do it anymore.
There is no light or expression in any of the eyes I try to draw. No wind in the hair. No feeling. No life.
There are things I'd like to draw but like everything I want in life, they are utterly unachievable.
Long times pass when I don't even try. And I've tried when I'm happy. Or sad. Or angry. Nothing works.
Everything remains empty and meaningless. Again and again I ask myself why I even try. I can't come up with any reason anymore. What once used to make me happier now just makes me feel worse. What used to be an enjoyable escape became a burden of eternal trying and failure. I'm sick of hating everything I do.
I'm letting myself off the hook. I won't try anymore.
I'm not saying I'm leaving this place. Although it wouldn't make much difference.
Thanks to everyone for all the kind words and support. I couldn't have asked for more.